Sunnyside all ze' way around.

Yeah, I borrowed that quote from "Hot Dog." The finest ski movie ever made (at least if you were a teenager in the '80s). Yesterday we went all the way around the Olympics.

The day started early for Katy (see post from earlier). Once she returned it was down the canyon to the Olympic Park (cross country and jumping site). The local committee has this down: grab a bus, chill for a half hour, go through security, walk about a mile to the event, grab a beer or two, some poutine (the height of Canadian haute cuisine - google it if you are a heathen), watch the Norwegians go nuts, and enjoy them as they win the women's 4x5km relay race...

Next up nothing! So off to Monk's for a ridiculously bad lunch (weird as I have spent a few foggy afternoons there), get back some tickets we we're trying to sell, and then a nap. But no, let's grab a cocktail and chill. You know what? We get perfect seats for the women's US/Canadian Hockey Gold Medal game and begin to root for the US and give the Canadians a hard time. They give it back as the Americans lay an egg. A side note: I had tickets for this event in Vancouver, but sold them ahead of time and they basically funded the trip we are on now in Whistler. I am a huge women's hockey fan. Another side note: I had tickets for the Canadian/Russian Men's hockey game, which went to Doug and Darren, and who now are my indentured servants for the next 2 1/2 years.

So feeling no pain and full of Olympic spirit we got in line for the nightly medal ceremony. This is a free event event but a pain in the ass to get into as you gotta line up 3 hours ahead of time. We line up (Katy yells at me for cutting in line, as well as some Estonians. Pffft Estonians.) and begin to wait and wait. I do make friends w/ the local stoners behind us and then realize I really drank a fair amount at that hockey game. Katy said it wasn't in the spirit of the games to relieve oneself on a Dutch fan (have you seen their national color-ORANGE-awful). So, before I can start a cross border incident, the Olympic Gods plucked us from the hoi poloy (sp?). Some random stranger came up to us and gave us 2 passes to get in... Sweet Christ on a pogo stick! Fantastic!

Inside is great as everyone is psyched to watch the medals be given out, sing their national anthem , and then party afterward. Note the pics of Johnny Spilane winning Nordic combined and us w/ the flags behind us. Good good night.

We wrap up Friday.

I went to the Olympics and all I got was these stupid red mittens.

Hey women folk! What's up w/ following the herd like a bunch of lemmings?

OK, Gentlemen, up here the hot souvenir/fashion statement are these red mittens w/ a Canadian maple leaf and the Olympic Vanoc logo. You know why they are so popular? G'damn Oprah and The Today Show. So Katy and every other female we know has been bugging us for a pair of these things.

So here's how you get them: 1) Go to the only officially licensed store that has them in stock. 2) Get laughed at for asking for a pair and get told to come back at the opening each day. 3) Opening is at 9am, but be there by 6:30am. 4) Ridiculous. 5) Listen to your wife pine away about how great these would look on her. 6) Promise to get up early as I do it anyway for a living... 7) Smile smugly as you know you have a lot of bourbon and beer in your belly and you would promise to tickle a grizzly bear's balls at that point (or one of the Russian fan's testicles). 8) Sleep soundly as Katy grumbles and slips away at 6:15 the next AM. 9) Wait 3 1/2 hours for her to return and explain it was the best Olympic experience she has had at Whistler. 10) Oh only two pair per customer... 11) The pair I am wearing are Katy's. I was not worthy of a pair. C'est la guerre.

Rain, beer, and sliding.

Ah, well wasn't able to sell some of my aerial tix, but ended up w/ some woman's bobsled tonight. Amazing! Loud, fast, and Katy's first Olympic event. Overall, she did pretty well tonight and even kept her shirt on... Frankly, I enjoy a fine bosom to send me on to my way to victory.

Oh, did you know these sleds go kinda fast? Amazing. And really loud. I'm extremely glad my kids didn't come to this event as they would want a bobsled.

So Canada came in Gold and silver, we got bronze. Good stuff. In fact we just finished dinner and got mobbed as the Canadian Women's Team came through our restaurant. Amazing.

Tomorrow more cross country.

Big Jumps and Big Mountains

Day Two...

A few notes on the fantastic people watching. I've decided to give a few awards based on vicious personal beliefs, biases, etc:

1) Worst dressed fans: The Russians. Jesus, they follow me every-where.

2) Most Enthusiastic: The Fins. They're like that goofy cousin you see once a year at Thanksgiving, funny, but you aren't having a drink with them after Grandma goes to bed.

3) Not afraid of a drink: The Poles, plus good looking women (caveat-below the age of 35, then Babushka city).

4) Rarest: Jamaicans. Only seen one and she was w/ her American Suga-Daddy.

5) Nicest: Canadians. Absolutely delightful and proud of these games. I just have a feeling they REALLy want to see the US fall on its' face. Hmmmm.

6) Scariest: Germans. Everyone seems to wander away when they start yelling. The Poles get really nervous.

OK. Enough bad stereotypes. Nordic Combined today. Half hour outside of Whistler, then a mile hike up to the sites (weeds out the weak fans). I am now an expert in all things associated w/ jumping and cross-country skiing. I will give a demonstration back in Ballard. Great day. Americans got Silver that came down to the last 50 yards of the cross-country section.

Tomorrow skiing or, if motivated, down the hill to Vancouver for Arials...

The Great White North

Excellent news, we snuck across the border w/ little fanfare. The border guard even congratulated us on Team USA Hockey's win. Hmmmmm, they're up to something.

Man, we flew up the highway, dodging RMCP the whole way. I've never had an easier drive. Sunny, clear, and 50 degrees in Whistler. Odd. All part of this Canadian "hospitality."

So, Whistler is PACKED w/ people. Loud, boisterous, and everyone is in Red & White. But you knew that. Luckily this nice Swiss gentlemen got us to our room. He kept offering to touch my Edleweiss, which I thought was a lovely gesture of Olympic spirit.

So we're cruising around and sampling the local beverages and begining our battle plan. Tomorrow will be our first event: ski jumping. Looks like it is down the road by about a half hour via shuttle. Katy has offered to get a massage.

Of to a dry sauna now and then to the local ticket scalper.

Olympic Fever does not go into remission

Again.

Back to the Heart of Darkness. This time I'm bringing Katy... Sam Sr is still emotionally shattered from our last Olympic trip.

Frankly, I'm a little nervous watching these Canadians. Top of the third period in USA vs Canada hockey. We're up 3-2, oooops, make that 4-2. If Team USA wins this game it could be an ugly border crossing. At least I'm in a Swedish car. I have a feeling they'll be ripping Americans out their cars and giving out cold syrup high-colonics if Team Canada loses.

Oh Canada, we stand on guard for thee...

Wish us luck, it should be an interesting week.